War Zone

My house is a war zone. You're almost always tripping over a toy, seeing a dish in the sink, and seeing laundry that needs to be folded.

I hate it.

I have to work super hard to take care of all four of my children and keep up with the house. This is all while trying to find a job to take care of them financially and while also trying to take care of myself. A lot of times, I'm alone. 

Then it got me focused back on a project that I wanted to do a long time ago. I wanted to document the life of a single mom. So I decided, why not do my own family? Why can't I focus on what goes on in my own household?

But as I've photographed us relentlessly over the last several weeks I've realized, really realized, something truly powerful. Many people are doing it alone. Even when they may not be alone, they still are. 

Then I realized that a lot of families, a lot of singles, a lot of couples face day to day and no one talks about it. No one talks about the anger mothers face when their children constantly rebel against them. No one talks about the abused woman who is too afraid to speak out and walks into her front door wondering if she's going to be hit again. Or what about the man who works 65 hour weeks and misses out on birthdays, holidays, even just time with his loved ones because he's so consumed with being the perfect employee.

No one talks about the seemingly adamantine situations so openly as to cut to the root of the issues. Instead, you find most people comparing their pasts, judging the now moments, and doubting their futures.

But you see friends. We are all in our own war zone. This is not a competition of whose past was the worst, whose life was more redeemed, or whose situation is more daunting. To each of us our situations are all hard. Our lives all have struggles and scream it if you have to but LIFE IS NOT ALL ROSES. My new motto is "bury the roses." Because if we bury that statement that life can always be sweet if we do x, y, and z then we can really get to the root of what issues we are facing day to day.

So enter in my new project "your'e not alone." Because each day for I honestly don't' know how long I will post my own war zone. Because life is tears, and pain, and tantrums, and walks in the park, and laughter, and you cannot leave anything out or you are missing key moments to grow.

You can start your own war zone project. You can document the realness in your life, share it with the world, and change a life. Over the course of time you can hashtag photos and short blurps of your own daily struggles. You can hashtag #warzone and #yourenotaloneproject and #burytheroses.

I cannot wait to walk this road. War doesn't scare me. What would scare me is not facing it head on. You need to know that you are not truly alone. That we can and will face these wars together.

Laughing with Joy

What makes God laugh? Does He laugh? Why of course. We make God laugh! At least, I know I do. I'm sure He looks down from Heaven and shakes His head and says, "It's Meg again." ha. As I laugh at each of my children, knowing so well their personalities, knowing their strengths and their weaknesses why would God, our father, not be amused by out antics knowing full well in advance what we are going to say and do? I think God thoroughly enjoys good humor; enjoys a good laugh and loves to see us enjoying it as well.

Joy and laughter are all apart of God's plan for us. Psalm 16:11 "You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forever." God's desire is that we have joy. Literally, if we are aiming to walk in His presence daily, consistently, then we are walking in the fullness of joy. The word fullness literally means to be filled to capacity. You need nothing else because God's presence has filled you so full that you are at capacity. Everything else that is given is simply, overflow.

Laughing is an expression of joy that comes from the heart of God Himself. Humor is encouraging and edifying to the body of Christ. Colossians 3:23 "Whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men." Laughter and joy comes under the category of whatever! Humor exhibits the joy, the passion, and the adventure of the Christian life.

Whenever I am around a group of people who are new to one another and haven't really met before the first technique I use in encouraging a comfortable atmosphere is humor. I am a very sarcastic human being and I love seeing people smile and laugh. The more people laugh the more relaxed they become and are able to be themselves and open up.

Literally laughter and music are two of God's finest gifts to us. They give us the ability to express our inner feelings about God with a sense of joy, anticipation, and participation. Participation being a key component. The Bible reminds us, "The joy of the Lord is our strength." (Neh 8:10) 

The best source of humor is right at the end of your nose. Especially if you're looking in the mirror. The ability to laugh at yourself is a sign of maturity, of healthy self-esteem, and of having your priorities straight. Remember, God is on the throne and we are on the ground. Humble, humus, and human; all words well-suited to our earthly imperfection compared to God's perfection.

Even more emotionally healing than laughing at ourselves is the ability to continue to laugh and choose joy when the story is repeated. Laughter is medicine to the soul. It is very healing. People in the medical field tell us what Bible has said all along, "A merry heart does good, like medicine, but a broken spirit dries the bones." (Prov. 17:22) We can make a choice. Be upset or talk about sour grapes; or be embarrassed -- or we can choose to laugh at ourselves. When we laugh, we heal.

Laughter puts the body in a state of relaxation. In a physically relaxed state, we take our foot off the pain accelerator and put on the brakes. Our bodies, in my opinion, were made for laughing. My laugh is a bit infectious and creepy; but sometimes when I start, I just can't stop. And when I look up, my eyes half squinted, I see others around me laughing too. And their faces illuminate joy. It's coming from the inside and is just a outward appearance of how their hearts feel at that moment.

Literally consider these few facts about laughter:

1. Laughter is a natural pain reducer.
2. Laughter increases our ability to cope with life.
3. Laughter massages our internal organs (and who doesn't love a good massage, eh?)
4. Laughter exercises our facial muscles
5. Laughter increased the heart rate and improves circulation (all perfect timing with February being heart health month!)
6. Laughter oxygenates the body.
7. Laughter stimulates the immune system (and that needs stimulation guys!).

We've all been in those high-stress, low-strength situations where we turn to our lover, or our best friend, or our family members and say, "Someday we'll laugh about this." I say, why wait? If we can see the humor potential, lets just dive right in! The time and distance between the difficulty and our ability to laugh about it is what I call the "stress zone." We can't hurry the time, but we can decrease the distance between the first and the last moment we spend in the zone.

Today, lets choose laughter and joy. I know it's hard, but don't wait.

Trials and Tribulations

One of the most difficult parts of the Christian life is that fact that becoming a disciple of Christ does not make us immune to life's trials and tribulations. Why would God, who is good and loving and compassionate, allow us to go through such things as the death of a child, disease, injury or pain, financial hardships, worry, etc. Surely, if He loved us, me, He would take all these things away from us? After all, doesn't Him loving us mean He wants our lives to be easy and comfortable? Well, no, it doesn't.

In fact, it's quite the opposite. The Lord wants us uncomfortable so that we can grow. So that our faith can be tested. So that we can withstand more and more. Being real and transparent here, I am going through some of the hardest tribulation and trials I've ever faced. I'm a single mom. I have no job. No money. My car by the grace of God is finally getting fixed; but I'm still having to use others.

He's growing me. And let me say this. I trust in my God. I trust in my savior and in my King. My tribulations and trials have nothing to do with my lack of faith. In fact, He's growing me in this area beyond what I've ever imagined. Every single day this week God has allowed a trial and I felt extremely alone in the physical. But spiritually not many knew or know that I feel strong. I feel comforted, I know that my King is with me.

As in all things, God's ultimate purpose for these things is so that I will be made more in the image of His son, Jesus. The same goes for you, when you are being tested. I know I'm not alone in this. Neither are you. Your trials, the ones He is allowing, they are for a purpose. And that purpose is growth. 1 Peter 1:6-7 states, "In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which perishes, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ."

Tested by fire. Fire hurts! Tribulations hurt. Yes, I have cried this week. Yes, I have felt physically alone. But my faith, being more precious than gold will be tested and I will honor and glory at the revelation of just how BOLD and beautiful Jesus is.

So here are a few things that can help you get through your trial. They seem unconventional. I promise, they will help you. These are the things I've been doing this season.

1. Give Thanks

Sometimes being thankful in a difficult situation is the most difficult thing you can do. Yet, Scripture is very clear about this response: “In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you” (I Thessalonians 5:18). To be thankful rather than to complain takes a conscious act of the will and a sacrifice of natural desires.

Thanking God in all things does not mean that we thank God for evil. It means that we are thanking God for the benefits He intends for us when He allows things to happen.

2. Rejoice! 

Along with giving thanks, we also are instructed to rejoice in all things: “Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice” (Philippians 4:4). Thanking God is an act of the will, but rejoicing is a response of the spirit. Therefore, it is possible to be sad and joyful at the same time. We cannot escape the pain of a difficult situation, but we can learn to rejoice in God Himself and in the good things God will do through our suffering.

Remember, when you are the one supporting someone going through a trial and tribulation; sometimes the best thing they need is for you to just be there. Comfort them. Hug them. Wipe away their tears. They can rejoice and still be sad. This doesn't mean they are faithless, or being punished, or not seeking God's face.

3. Believe and Act on the Word of God

When Jesus was tested in the wilderness, He responded to each temptation by quoting Scripture. For example, when Satan urged Christ to turn stones into bread, Jesus quoted from Deuteronomy 8:3: “It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God” (Matthew 4:4). We can follow Jesus’ example and successfully engage in spiritual warfare by proclaiming truth in the face of tests and temptations.

The LAST thing you need to be in trials and tribulations in silent. You need to proclaim God's truth over your life, over your families, and over the situation at hand. BE BOLD and approach God's thrown.

4. Cry Out to God

Job even in his suffering CRIED out. It's OK! perhaps the greatest reason God has for taking us through the trials of life is to bring us to the firm conclusion that we need God. What is God’s purpose in giving us commands that seem impossible to carry out? He desires to work powerfully through our lives; therefore we must learn to depend on Him. He alone must become our source of strength, provision, protection, and direction. God will send the appropriate people into your life to help guide you and be with you, but at the end of the day, He is the one who will sustain us.

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Those are just four things I'm leaning on currently. Those closest to me, those privileged get to see the rough edged Meg. I recommend you not just tell everyone, everything, in your season of trial and tribulation. Not everyone will walk with you through it in the way you need them too. Make your needs known; those who care and love you deeply will do whatever they can by the grace of almighty God to help you.

Love is Action

Most people have heard of the Five Love Languages. The love languages is a specific way to love another (you love in their love language not yours). The five common ones are physical touch, quality time, acts of service, gifts and words of affirmation. A lot of people though take it to the extreme and only love others in what they suspect are their two top ones (ie: my top one is physical touch with my secondary being quality time; however I have qualities of the other three that I desire).

This got me thinking about several times in my life where I realized that love was an action and not just a state of being or something that was idle. It literally is an action word. Even recently, after a misunderstanding with someone, they made the statement, "You want me to show you I care, you want proof after proof; but you just have to trust me." 

Something didn't completely settle with me on this statement. I prayed on it and asked God to clearly reveal to me how I was to love. Meaning, how do I show someone I love them or care about them. Can I simply just tell them I care and then move on?

No. Love is action. Jesus showed His love for us by literally dying on the cross. 1 John 3:16 "By this we know love, because He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the breathern." 

Literally Jesus' entire life was one big action of love. He healed the sick, He ministered to those who wanted to hear truth, He pursued people passionately through His actions. It was never just words for Him, He always backed up His love with some sort of action whether it was a miracle or a simple spending time with people, etc.

Christ literally performed the ultimate act of love. Christ loved us so much that He died for us. This should motivate us to love others and to love them in the same way that Christ loved us. This means not just saying we love people but really loving them by our actions. We can love our families by showing respect, being courteous, having patience, and understanding in all types of ways. We can love our neighbors by reaching out to them in kindness. We can love the needy of the world by sharing our possessions with them. Loving actions reveal the truth and depth of our love.

Love is selfless. Love thinks of others before it thinks of oneself. 1 John 3:18 My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth. This is not me, this is scripture. We must love one another through deed { actions! } and in truth.

I saw a picture perfect representation of this yesterday at the funeral of my best friends, Papa Jack. He was also like my Papa and I loved and still love him dearly { and his incredible wife Margaret }. I've been best friends with Christin for as long as I can remember. She was the only person that came to support me when I was in the custody battle for my daughter (who was non-blood related). But yesterday we needed each other and we needed other people.

The group I'm apart of, Multiply Charlotte, really showed the action love of Jesus Christ yesterday. We had the leader, Danny come out plus Bethany and the gentlemen I am seeing Aaron all came to support us. Bethany and Danny, even Aaron, didn't have to come. They do not know Christin's family on an intimate level like her and I do. They could have made the choice to say, "I'm sorry for your loss, praying for you." But they didn't just do that. They showed the love of Jesus, in the way that Jesus would show it, by showing up and offering an ear, a shoulder, and a place of rest for both of us.

In human relationships love is the same concept. People must choose the attitude of love and then express it by their behavior. Such behavior touches the heart and emotions of those they love and moves them to reciprocate it. In the Bible, the word "love" does not refer to an emotion, but to an attitude and behavior (including both actions and words). Love is the attitude that stems from choosing to look out for other's interest first; then loving behavior follows.

Today, lets choose something different. Lets choose to love by action. Lets love each other like Jesus did when He spread those two arms across and stood in the in-between for you and I. It can be difficult and uncomfortable, but it's rewarding.

1 John 3:17 But whoever has this world's goods and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him?

Isolation

Isolation. Isolation is a major dilemma facing God's people today. It is even at times, encouraged from other believers, with the sense that, "Leadership is lonely; being set apart is lonely; or you sometimes have to walk alone." 

But this is a lie. Isolation is not of God. Period. 

Lets look back first at the garden of Eden. God created Adam and what did He say? And the Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." (Genesis 2:18) From the beginning of creation God saw the heart of man and knew that it was not good that he be isolated or alone. Many people have become emotionally and relationally cut-off from others. Everyone seems to be leading busy lives yet often we are not connected to others for any real deep purpose. When we are under pressure, or our relationships are suffering, or life has too many unpleasant surprises we are often tempted to keep these things to ourselves. 

Isolation is more than just not having someone to talk with. Isolation weakens our spiritual defenses. We often forget that we are in a spiritual battle every day. This is a war for our spiritual well-being, our effectiveness for God, and our impact on those closest to us. Isolation from others is deadly. 

Isolation stunts spiritual growth and opens us up to spiritual attack. 

Paul stated in Romans 7:21, "I find this law at work: When I want to do good evil is right there with me." Without other strong believers around us we fall prey to attacks that we can easily feel defeated by. We don't talk about our situation, we don't listen to others wisdom and we don't seek it out. The enemy wants to get you alone because than you are easily swayed. When there are other praying and scripture reading believers around you, he will attack, sure, but you are less likely to fall because you have the voice of reason (scripture and wisdom from others) helping to keep you grounded. 

How do I know if I am isolating myself or if I'm just resting in Solitude?

Isolation is simple; it's the attempt to be alone or spend a lot of time alone so you don't have to open up on a deeper level. You don't want to expose certain area of your life or you may even feel the need to protect certain things. Sometimes a vicious cycle can develop where the more time you spend alone, the less you feel like people understand you, and the less you feel like people understand you, the more time you want to spend alone. 

Isolating yourself can cause a lot of problems both spiritually and naturally. Spiritually you may feel justified but God never intended for people to be alone. He created community and the helper for a reason. When you are spiritually isolated you could be bound in chains and affection, while you could be praying and reading your bible a lot you still don't reach your potential growth because you aren't being sharpened by another brother, and you could be walking in deceit and opening yourself up to spiritual attacks from the enemy. 

Some of the effects of isolation can include feelings of loneliness, alcohol or drug problems, trouble sleeping and can even lead to depression. 

Be aware that some may encourage isolation or loneliness based off a judgment such as not being "equal to someone" or a particular group of people. You can be in an intimate relationship or friendship with someone who is on a different spiritual level or who are gifted in different areas. 

With solitude there is an understanding that you are never alone --- God is always with us. Solitude can be refreshing and restful and provide a moment of peace and clarity for us. However solitude is an afternoon of peace or journaling, a weekend away camping to focus on God. Solitude never takes us away for long. Jesus was never off by himself for months at a time. 

Photo by Alan Derwin

Loneliness; a choice or a state of being? 

Loneliness is a powerful trigger towards isolation and often leads to spiritual deceit, chains, and even risky behavior. A husband who convinces himself that he cannot open to his wife, or that no one around him could understand what he's struggling with, buys into the lie the enemy is setting him up for. He begins to isolate himself, not talking to anyone, not attending his small groups. Then in walks the gorgeous blonde at work who makes him feel safe, secure, heard; and thus an affair begins. Although he was intoxicated by isolation and fantasy, he had to know that it would lead to that affair - yet he continued down that path anyway. Until he couldn't turn around anymore, at least felt like that. But like with Adam and Eve who hid themselves in the garden, God knew exactly where he was. And God intervened and revealed the lie. 

Loneliness, while a feeling we feel as humans, is still a choice. As the enemy of our souls roars and throws the bait into our path, we learn to step over it -- being obedient to the word of truth that lives within us. We learn to live like we really are in Christ. We learn to take our stand in faith with our feet planted -- not moved by the insanity that is around us. Even though you may feel lonely, you are not. You can reach out to others and actively seek community. 

The enemy has gone before us, friends, preparing the bait to move us towards that trap. Just as a hunter guides his prey down the path of destruction before it's too late for the prey to escape. The enemy is well aware of our weaknesses that triggers us to lean towards isolation. He doesn't want you free. He wants you bound; he wants you constricted, he wants you in chains. He knows these things not because he can read our minds but because he's been studying our behavior. He's an incredible observer.

Lets be sober minded. 1 Peter 5:8 "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." When we isolate, we attempt to resolve the problems in our life or figure out serious life decisions or even plan our future apartment from anyone and everyone else. We pull away from family, friends, church our spouses - even sometimes God, to do what we want to do; to protect what we believe we need to protect because others don't agree, because we don't trust, or we think "they won't understand." Although we may think we are in the right and are doing well, the enemy is watching and he sees that you are alone and he's ready to attack. 

Think on these three questions:

What type of things trigger you to want to isolate yourself?

In these types of things what behaviors are associated with that isolation?

What do you need to do to overcome isolation?

Glory in Suffering

I'm a private person. Surprising, I know. I share when necessary but truthfully I don't talk a lot about what goes on in my heart and in my mind. Those thoughts and feelings are saved for certain people and God; and only come after trust is built (well not with God because I trust Him completely).

But lately I've been suffering. I lost my job at the beginning of January, then within two weeks the engine in my van broke; the job that I was supposed to get (it was a waitress job) seems to have fallen through and despite my relentless pursuit of a job I haven't gotten one call back.

I don't know how I'm going to pay February's rent.

I don't know how I can pay my bills when what I take in (my only income currently is child support) is far substantially less than what I have to put out.

But the Bible does not hesitate to describe the human condition and the reality of living in a sinful world. Suffering is an inescapable part of that reality. And I'm constantly reminding myself that someone is suffering far greater than I am. Ecclesiastes teaches, "For in much wisdom is much grief, and he who increases knowledge increases sorrow." (Eccl. 1:18)

No one is immune from suffering. Not you, not me, not the president. Suffering may come as a result of a person's sin and failure. For example, some people may suffer financially by not carefully budgeting their money or being wasteful. However, suffering may also arise due to other people's sin and failure or other forces outside of our control. An example of this is a drunk driver who causes an accident creating suffering for others.

We know that people suffer - we see it or experience it every day. "We also who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, eagerly waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body." (Rom. 8:23) Suffering is common to all people and is not removed by the presence of the Holy Spirit. Being a Christian is a not a "get out of suffering free" card. I am a living testiment of this. Literally I have felt like I have poison in my blood and that everything I touch becomes tainted or of no value or just simply, poisoned. This however is a mistruth because Christians experience suffering like everyone else. No better illustration of this principle can be found but with Job!

Satan complained to God that Job, a righteous man, served God only because his life was relatively free of suffering. A wager was made and with God's consent the course of Job's suffering increased. With the increased suffering came Job's increased questions and struggles with God. His demand for a hearing concerning his questions grew to such a tempo that God deepened jobs suffering by bringing his soul low with humility. In that suffering, Job found that his deepest desire was not for relief, but that what he wanted more than anything was the presence of God. Suffering awakened him to a deeper desire for God.

This is exactly what has happened to me over the course of my entire life. Real talk; my life has never been easy. The moment I think I have found something wonderful or great it disappears or walks out and then half the time I am blamed for the demise or the outcome.

Human suffering aroused my anger, invigorated my action and as a result enabled me to push back  the darkness of the fall. Suffering really humanizes me and my heart and increases my hunger for God and His presence.

So today, it was rough. I suffered. I didn't talk about my feelings to anyone and I wrote them out in my journal. I realized by the end that I was writing specifically to Jesus and was groaning and crying out for HIM.

My situation could be worse. I could be homeless. My children could be ill. But none of this has happened. So I will, walk humbly in the suffering, and trust that this is just for a season. And that in this grief I am gaining wisdom and that with all the knowledge I gain more sorrow will follow. I will also hold firm to the truth that I am not flowing with poison. That I am full of the Spirit of God which is exactly the opposite; it gives life.

Today, know that God is bigger than your suffering.

Maturity and Change

{ This is a devotional that goes along with a new series I'm doing daily. Enjoy }

I joined a non-conventional Bible Study group called Multiply last September. It's unconventional because we are not affiliated with a church, we meet in a public place and even though we are currently in a book study we are 100% Spirit lead.

I've also never grown as much, spiritually, as I have since joining this group. This got me thinking, can people really change this dramatically? Even more, can believers actually become more like Christ?

Scripture affirms that people can change, doesn't make change an option, and offers guidance for producing positive change. We are told, "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new" ( 2 Cor. 5:17)

So....change to what?

Scripture identifies a common goal for all who are in the upward cycle toward maturity; coming to "unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the statue of the fullness of Christ" (Eph. 4:13). Paul was reminding Timothy that every Christian or believer in Jesus needed to study scripture. Scripture is vital to our spiritual health. We have achieved maturity when we help edify others, contribute to the body of Christ, and are filled with Christ so that we are equipped for every god work.

Change....why and how??

In our close relationships we may be called to help shape or sharpen one another for the better. "As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend" (Prov. 27:17) Our goal is not to judge in a fleshly way. Believers are meant to judge each other righteously and in maturity and love. You also need to be humble when receiving correction or sharpening and vice versa. There will be times where you will be the one sharpened and then other times you will be the one God uses to sharpen. It's a two way street. Paul wrote, "Now I myself am confident concerning you, my brethern, that you also are full of goodness, filled with knowledge, able also to admonish one another (Rom. 15:14). Following are a few questions we should ask ourselves:

What is our authority for guiding change in ourselves and others?

Our authority is the truth and word of God. It sets the standards for our behaviors; period. When we challenge ourselves with the word we then can also challenge our brothers and sisters with the word. We should not make a move though to help someone unless directly lead by the Holy Spirit. If He has asked you (speaking believer to believer and not in an evangelical way) to help this person or to speak to them He will provide the time, words, and resources you need.

What should we seek to challenge change in others?

When beliefs and behaviors do not correctly align to the truth in the Bible we need to reprove the unbiblical beliefs.

How will we know if the change we desire to see has really occurred?

Jesus Christ will become visible in you (if you are being sharpened or seeking to change in an area) or them as they respond to biblical truth and sharpening. We will see victories, chains being broken, and miracles and gifts being used. Remember, however, change takes time and ultimately it is the Spirit who changes and convicts the heart we are just the mouth God uses to share His truth.

Change...Trying VS. Training

Frequently we see the need for change in ourselves and others. We think and write out lists of what we need to change, we talk to our friends about what we are feeling led to share as a challenge with our friends and for a few days we try hard to change and then suddenly we just "crash and burn." Why? Because we are trying, and trying almost always ends in failure. When people try to change, they are merely hoping that they will find the inner strength to behave differently.

The biblical model though is not trying it is training. Paul teaches that maturity and change comes with training. "Exercise yourself toward godliness" ( 1 Tim. 4:7). There is an enormous difference between trying to meet a goal and training to meet a goal. People may try all they want to win the big race, but the winner will be the one who has been in training. 

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Are you training or trying? Are you actively praying for God to send you people to sharpen you? Are you humble enough to admit when you need to improve in any area? Mediate on those things today.

{Interested in knowing more about Multiply Charlotte? Visit our Facebook Page  or email us at multiplycharlotte@gmail.com} 

Building Good Relationships

This past week as God has challenged my walk I've also felt challenged to share a series of devotional type blog posts that I have in my heart. Scripture is extremely important in our spiritual health. It's like being a runner and not stretching or hydrating.

This morning I felt led to talk about relationships. What can be done to build a good relationship? What does a good relationship look like? I have experienced so many bad, that I'm finally recognizing the good. It all started with me realizing that we cannot do a whole lot to cultivate a healthy relationship. Techniques simply do not work. Real relationships evolve out of being a certain kind of person. We must focus on who we are in a relationship rather than what we do. 

Photo by Meg Martino Photography | My best friend

Ecclesiastes 4:8 says, "There is one alone, without companion: He has neither son nor brother. Yet there is no end to all his labors nor is his eye satisfied with riches. But he never asks, "For whom do I toil and deprive myself of good?" 

The Bible makes it clear that isolation and loneliness is not good or pleasant. You can work your butt off and wake up one day and realize, "I have no one to share this with. This is not worth it."

Following are a few of the most important ways of "being" in order to have, cultivate, and encourage good relationships.

Be someone who listens.

At the heart of every good relationship is the ability to listen and to try and understand what another person is saying, regardless of how you feel or what you think. Without accurate listening, a good relationship can never be built. Listen intently and respond appropriately, even if that means not responding immediately. Like a mirror reflects an image, we can reflect the person's message by saying something like, "What I hear you saying....." or repeating a small bit of what they've said back to them.

Be someone who is safe. 

A close relationship is built on feelings of security and trust. You cannot have a healthy relationship without these things; especially a dating relationship or marriage. If people do not feel safe, there is no hope of them ever opening up and being authentic or real with you. People who keep their word, follow through, and encourage their friends to be themselves create a sense of security in the relationship. Once you earn someone's trust, your relationship is able to flourish.

Be someone who serves. 

In rewarding relationships people don't just have feelings of security and trust but they also give to one another more than they like to receive. If a relationship is built upon Jesus and two servants you cultivate a relationship of giving; and not selfishness. Sometimes that help may be literal or tangible; a ride to work, babysitting the kids, etc. At other times it may be praying for you, giving you reassurance after a job interview. The point is we should help them because we want to and because we are appreciated, not because we have to.



Be someone who walks in another's shoes. 

The bible says we are to carry one another's burdens (Galatians 6:2). You have to try and learn to see the world from another person's perspective. You have to aim to have empathy. Once we put ourselves in other people's shoes we begin to understand why they may react, feel and think the way they do. Remember, it's not always about you. 

Be someone who weathers turbulence. 

Almost every good and healthy relationship eventually encounters a rough spot, a time when both people, whether in a marriage, dating situation or friendship, feels like giving up. It can be a scary phase in a relationship especially when a lot of time has been invested. It is a good indication though of a conversation that needs to happen about your true feelings; your likes and dislikes, the good, the bad and the ugly. But if we are mature enough the time of turbulence can lead to a deeper more intimate and more beautiful relationship.

Be someone who is constant and consistent. 

Some friends carry the ability to go months and years without talking and then they can pick right back up where they left off. Some don't. Know your friend or significant other well enough to know what helps make them feel secure. When someone is constantly in and out of your life or does not follow through or stay true they are setting up a foundation of inconsistency that can lead to a lot of really big issues in the future. Be constant.

Be someone who knows when to call it quits. 

There are some relationships that are not worth the work for the level of intimacy we are seeking. Of course, every relationship needs nurturing, but some relationships no matter how hard you try are doomed to disaster. If we are in a relationship where we are constantly trying to win the persons acceptance or approval or never feel accepted or good enough, the relationship is probably not a good one. You should be able to walk in who you are and your friend or significant other should be able to challenge you to grow not to hurt you. When you are in this type of relationship we need to call it quits before the other person's rejection damages us and limits our usefulness to God.

----

Ultimately, and in closing, relationships are complex. Building your relationships strong by examining yourself to determine the type of person you are, rather than focusing only on the things we do. If we focus on who we are first the things we do will follow naturally.

Reflection { 2 0 1 4 }

2 0 1 4. 

It's done. I'm so thankful. Quite frankly I had a good year in some respect but in other areas it was probably one of the worst. 

Every time the new year approaches I always tell people, "This is it. This is my year. It's going to be great! Fantastic! Unlike any other year I've ever experienced."

Ha, there is some truth to that. Every year is not like any other. I experience new things; new pain; new growth. But to go into a year claiming it as the best is a bit unrealistic. 

We don't know how the year is going to go; ever. We can only approach the New Year with a heart of thanksgiving and with the prayerful hope that our relationship with God will improve and be better. Because some years I think it's going to be the best and it turns out the worst. And others I think are going to be crappy and they are good. 

Here's a reflection in photographs (photos will be below each reflection). Good times, the bad, you name it. 

January - March

  Snow, birthdays, and new training. I had the opportunity to be a part of a series called L7 where I got to work with young people and trained them to serve in God's house. There were lots of baby snuggles with Joseph, kisses, and time with siblings. 

April - June 

Lots of growth spiritually. To be honest my marriage was having lots of difficulties and pushing through that and learning to grow through that was hard. 

But I also had a lot of great moments. Took the kids on my first singular vacation to Myrtle Beach. We had a blast. My best friend came down the second day and we just enjoyed the beach and hung out. I also met new people, and started my photography business. 

My favorite quote of that time was the one below "take into account that great love & great achievements involve great risk." Still is proving true in this new season I'm in.

July - September 

What a few beautiful months these were. Things were really tough in my marriage and getting worse but my relationship with Jesus was getting better. I was pushing more into Him and got a thirst for His word like I've never gotten before. 

I also celebrated my favorite holiday; Fourth of July. It was just me and my two youngest (Joseph and Sophia) and I walked 4 miles from a parking garage in uptown to see fireworks. Sadly both the kids fell asleep so I walked them back the four miles one on my shoulder and one in the stroller. 

I got to visit the beach, old friends, and my baby girl started first grade (and my teenager 11th grade!). 

I also joined a bible group called Multiply, lead by one of my closest friends Danny. This group has been life changing. 

October - December

October through December have both been the most challenging and most fulfilling. Tony moved out and our legal separation began. My son had surgery (which was both terrifying and good). I ran my second 5K; alone. 

It was a time and season where I realized that I didn't need others to encourage me to do things and to get things done. Jesus became my solid everything.

I also was freed from a fleshly soul tie on October 29th. Literally while riding from work. I've grown close to people; lost some; but ultimately my relationship with Jesus is the strongest it's ever been. His grace and restoration has abounded beyond what I can imagine in my life. 

{ 2 0 1 5 }

I'm ready.

I don't know what is all to come.

I do know that my greatest goal is to continue growing closer to Jesus. 

This is what it's all about.

Pursuing Him. 

Happy New Year.

Lust and the Christian Woman

I took a vow of purity.

This is a result of an ending marriage and the serious, "I'm sick and tired of doing it the world's way," attitude towards sex, lust, and romantic relationships. Because being transparent I used to have a serious lust problem. 

Where my girl friends would see an attractive guy and say, "Oh he's so handsome," I would look at an attractive guy and be wondering, "I wonder if he's good in bed?" It was shameful, difficult to talk about, and down right, hard to stop.

I hated myself when I would lust. Lust would always lead me into things that made me even more shameful; ie: masturbation. Lust, masturbation, pornography; it's just not really talked about among Christian women. I don't think I've ever attended any type of women's setting where someone just boldly said, "OK. Who here has a lust problem? Lets deal with it."

I needed that. 

I needed someone to step up and say, "Hey! Meg! I've been there too." But I've only talked to a handful of women who have said they struggled with serious lust. That they too felt the shame and conviction that came with this struggle. When God prompted me to write this, I thought He was mistaken. Crazy. I have a wild and crazy story and with that story had come a lot of feelings of unworthiness because of stupid, sinful, and lustful decisions I've made.

Sex for a while for me, was just that, sex. I didn't think I was feeling an emotional connection to these guys and in honesty I wasn't. They would use me, and sometimes I would use them; but the residue left by each encounter was devastating. By the time I got to be 24/25 I felt like that was all I was good for. A good time.

I don't have all the answers. I do know a few things about what lust breeds and what the difference is between lust and love; now. I didn't before, but God dealt with me heavily on that.

When I took this purity vow back in late September I took it with the complete understanding that I was going to remain sex-free until whenever God brought a future husband for me. This was already weird to say. I just left a failed marriage. But. I knew that God was calling me into a state of holiness and purity that I never experienced. I got serious about it. Wrote it out. I knew that eventually later when the time was right I would date again, and I would have to decide on boundaries, and I did. Already.

But I also purged masturbation. I didn't want this act to fuel my lust. I have always felt like the black sheep around women. I rarely cry, I'm "hardcore" as some would say, because I don't always pity a tough journey or a tough situation. I don't want people to give me the easy road, or to always say yes, or to give me pleasures just because. Sex, lust, masturbation; it was an easy way for me to avoid having to get super emotionally attached to anyone. Because I had never met a guy that was on my level, that could handle my level, and that cared enough to value my purity.

When it came to masturbation I found that this was less taboo with women too. Everyone talks about it like it's just what you do and I've even heard statements to the extent that "masturbation will help me remain sexually pure." Hold up. WHAAAAAT?

So many people don't understand the purpose of sex; which is oneness and procreation. 

When you have sex with someone you are literally becoming one with them, there's a connection that happens, that cannot be avoided. Period. There is a difference between having a strong spiritual connection (as well as intellectual and emotional) vs. a powerful sexual craving for them. We can have sexual cravings for someone and not be any where near on level with them in any other way. These are relationships you want to run from.

Lust is not something that we’re supposed to do (I John 2:16). Sex with ourselves isn't either (why do you need to “become one” with yourself?). We don't. We are meant to become one with our spouses when that time is right. Masturbation is a way to meet a need and often time as a single person that need is fueled by lust and selfish desires.

So I've purged masturbation. 

And it's so hard. I had to change my heart and mind. I had to understand that God was calling me into this season not just for me, but for others around me, so that those girls could hear my story too. So that I could encourage other young ladies and even women that they are worth more than instant pleasure.

You are worth it to wait for a deep spiritual and intellectual connection. You are worth it to wait for a man who sees YOU. Understands you. And doesn't just see the breasts on your chest or a possible quick sexual encounter.  



The next issue that I had to deal with is that a man who really loved me and cared for me wouldn't just try to get me in bed. Sadly, I have slept with many of my previous boyfriends/spouses within a month of meeting them. Sometimes sooner. It was just a silent understanding that this would happen and if it didn't then we probably wouldn't be together.

If he's not touching you or trying to sleep with you within a few weeks, that doesn't mean he's not attracted to you. In fact, if he's protecting your purity he's REALLY into you. 

And because I didn't have security in who God made me, I just did it. And then these guys hurt and abused me and I was left feeling like I deserved nothing. I felt like I was a curse to everything and everybody. That my life was just meant to be one abusive and hurtful relationship after another. It saddens me to know that I never really experienced a guy who loved me enough to care about my mind, my spiritual life, my soul.

But God has so much for me and God has so much for you. And those things don't include lust, pornography, insecurity.

Look. We are beautiful, ladies. And sexuality is a big part of our lives. 

And that's OK if it's handled in a healthy, righteous, and Godly way. I struggled with the idea that God could give me a pure love. I felt like I was wearing a scarlet letter. That every one could see the choices I had made; that no Godly man would see past the past and look into the future that God had for me. But Jesus is bigger than my past. And any man that God had for me would understand this. He wouldn't care, because he would love Jesus so deeply that He could only see me the way Jesus saw me; redeemed.

Ladies, I write all this to say if you are struggling with lust you are not alone. One night stands, masturbation, even the sexual relationship with your boyfriend that makes you feel convicted; I've been there. And it's ok to stop.

I'm a living example of that and one day when I walk down the aisle to greet my husband I hope to proudly to portray a redeemed and purified woman. Because even though I cannot offer him the gift of my virginity I can offer him the gift of my purity. Purity and virginity are not the same. You can be a virgin and not be pure. Just like I can be pure but not be a virgin.

There are also many resources for woman who struggle with lust in any form whether that be viewing pornography, etc. I would be more than happy to help guide you in those areas if  you want to message me or send me an e-mail to meganloismartino@gmial.com.

Ladies. It's time. It's time we take pride in who God created us to be. It's time that we value ourselves and up the standards.

Mom's Cry Too

Wednesday I got off work from the office early at noon. I was ecstatic to go home. I was exhausted. I had barely gotten any sleep all week { I dream a lot } and I just wanted to be with my babies. (And I wanted a nap!)

So I went home and cleaned up a bit and got a bunch of popcorn made { I'm a popcorn junkie } and told the littles they were going to play quietly while mommy watched a movie and rested. I had rented "The Fault in our Stars" and just wanted to relax.

The movie started. I just laid there and watched it. It was actually a lot better than I thought it was going to be. I'm not into sappy love stories { sometimes } and actually I try to avoid them right now. Without spoiling the movie for anyone there was a point in time where I lost it.

I had no sleep.

     I was emotionally charged because of my dreaming.

And these teenagers love.....intense. Real. Genuine.

I just started crying. My mind was whirling, "Here I am, 27, all I wanted was a family. A man. Who loved me for me. But again here I sit alone, holidays coming, children. Single mommy. Doing it by.myself."

I was having a little pity party honestly. But in reality I was really vulnerable in a moment of pain.

I started crying. And then I kept crying and it got really intense for me really fast. And I couldn't stop and my makeup was running and the next thing I knew Sophia was at my side. She asked, "Mommy, why are you crying?"

This was it. It was time to teach my children about being vulnerable. It was time to show them that I do cry and get upset. Something I rarely do. 

I responded, "Sophia, Mommies get sad too." Because we do. We do get sad, we get mad, we are selfish and we feel things. I don't know about other moms because I'm different but a lot of my feelings are held inside in front of my kids because I don't want them hurting. I don't want them seeing my vulnerable. I want them seeing me as something and someone strong. I realize however that true strength and beauty comes with exposure.

So I sat there, and she cried, and I cried, and I felt sad for my children. I felt responsible that their fathers are not as involved as I would want them to be.

And then walked in Joseph, my 16 month old son. He had a hand held towel. He walked right over to me and began wiping my face. He would babble into between, kiss my cheeks, and continue wiping. I had just written the blog post of the King who wiped the mud off the face of the dirty princess and literally felt like Jesus was confirming something in my heart through my son. Not just that but it was an example of my sons and any child's natural compassion towards the hurting. Joseph is going to be something really great one day.

He continued to wipe my face, which made me cry harder, for at least three or four minutes. And then he patted my hand and walked away. Such a bizarre and older like thing for a 16-month-old to do.

Everything is going to be ok mom. 

Yes.

Thirty Before Thirty

I like getting older. I was an awkward child. I always smiled but my teeth were all crooked and I was loud and obnoxious { some things don't change much I suppose }.

I am still young though. Even though I am the healthiest I've ever been, the prettiest I've ever been, I still have so much to do. So much to see. So I am making a 30 before 30 list and I'm going to accomplish every single one.

1. Visit a Starbucks in every state in the U.S.A

2. Go on a missions trip

3. Record a CD of lullabies for my children

4. Vacation in Europe

5. Learn spanish fluently { for real! }

6. Finish and finalize my degree

7. Run a half marathon

8. Run a full marathon

9. Go scuba diving

10. Go horse back riding at dusk

11. In the year I'm 29 - do an act of random kindness every day for the entire year

12. Go stargazing

13. Plant a tree

14. Write a book

15. Share my story in a large public setting

16. Learn to play the violin or cello.

17. Go on a random weekend trip; no plans, no reservations, just a bag and your car.

18. Star in a film or play

19. Jump off a waterfall


20. Do a warrior themed photo shoot

21. Visit an orphanage

22. Meet my father

23. Visit a volcano

24. Go on a cruise

25. Visit a castle

26. Read the Bible completely

27. Visit the Holy Land

28. Get out of debt

29.  Experience a real, pure, and Godly love from a man

30. Then marry that son of a gun and go on a romantic get-a-way that people only dream of ( ha ha)

Lets do this.

Open the Door

Several weeks ago I was chatting with a friend at my home when I began to tell him the story of the princess and the pea. I don't remember why this story got brought up; or what relevance it had to what we were discussing I just know that it rocked my world. I want to share it. Piece by piece.

You see this story is important because it shows not just an earthly love a man should have for a woman, but also the love that Jesus has for us.

So there was a princess. She was on her way to an important event { this part I'm guessing } when her carriage broke down and they got into a carriage wreck.

Her driver went for help. But was gone for two days and she was starving, dirty, cold and wet. She knew she had to get out of the carriage and bravely make her way to find help. So she did. She got out and began to walk. 

Her walk was strenuous. Tiring. Very lonely. For much of the walk tears were shed and she wondered to herself if she would ever find help. She was merely surviving.

Soon she stumbled upon a castle. It was a beautifully decorated castle. She knew she was taking a risk knocking on the door because even though she was a princess she was muddy, and wet, And who would ever believe that she was, who she said she was. She knocked though. On that large castle door and hoped that someone would answer.

Photo Courtesy of Ruby Weddings

And someone did. The mother of a King seeking a Queen. This mother looked through the peep hole on the door and saw a girl standing there. A girl who was dirty. Who was unpleasant to the eyes. Her son came up behind her and asked who was there. The conversation went as follows:


"Mother, who is at the door?"
"A woman my son."
"Well open it! This might be my Queen!"
"No, this is not your Queen. This girl is dirty and unpleasant to the eyes. She's not for you."
"She may appear this way, but I have this stirring in my heart that she is it."

The King went on to argue with his mom for several moments. The princess on the outside, waited. Sometimes, we have to wait. Sometimes what we want is right inside that door. On the flip side what that King wanted and prayed for was right outside that door. He knew it. He knew despite this girls outwardly appearance that she would be the one for him.

Finally they agreed to let her in. When she was brought inside he immediately called for his servants. He asked them to bring a towel and then began to wipe her face, her arms. He tenderly dried her hair. Finally he had her taken to be cleaned up completely. He had the finest silk dress brought to her chambers and told her when she was done being cleaned up to come down for a royal feast. He was going to show this girl, who humbly stayed quiet and answered simple questions he asked, that she was of value.

After she cleaned up she came down to join the King and his mother for breakfast. She was a site to behold. The mother however, was still uncertain. The princess shared the story of her carriage being wrecked and how she was a princess. The mother annoyed and angry pulled her son aside. She said:

"Lets test her tonight. In her sleeping chambers put a pea under nine mattress. Any woman who claims to be a true princess, and is, would feel the pea under all the mattresses and would have a restless nights sleep."

The King obliged in hopes to show his mother the truth { and to shut her up }.

You see, ladies. This is such a good spiritual lesson. We are to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit. There are times when our carriages will wreck, we will walk a long and lonely road, but this should never hinder what the Lord wants to do in us. That princess had to be sensitive to know to get out of the carriage and go. If she would have sat waiting for her driver than she would have never met this King and she would have missed out on her destiny. Don't wait.

That night the King kissed the forehead of the princess and told her that he was glad she knocked on his door. She responded, "I'm even more grateful you opened the door to me my King."

Ruth 2:10 says, "So she fell on her face, bowed down to the ground, and said to him, "Why have I found favor in your eyes, that you should take notice of me, since I am foreigner!"

Same story. Just like Ruth in that moment couldn't understand why Boaz would take interest in her the princess couldn't imagine why the King would open the door for her. But he did. Jesus did. And He welcomes you completely with open arms. Cleans us up. Feeds us and dresses us.

Photo Courtesy of Ruby Weddings

I had to learn this lesson the hard way. I didn't realize how tenderly Jesus desired me. Not only that but how deeply Jesus desired for me to know an earthly man in this way. It's possible. Fairy tales are real; even if they don't happen exactly how the movies say it does. Because I live a fairy tale every day.

The King desired the princess. He saw her worth. He saw her spirit. We have to stop looking for earthly spouses in the natural. We have to see deeper, we have to look at them through the eyes of Jesus and find someone who's spirit is more beautiful than anything on the outside. 

"I am my beloved’s, And his desire is toward me." Song of Solomon‬ ‭7‬:‭10‬

So the princess, she goes to sleep that night. She tosses and turns all night getting barely an hour { man do I relate here } of rest. She wakes the next morning and joins the King and his mother for breakfast. She sat down and began to eat when the King said, "Princess, is everything ok? You look tired."

The princess responded, "No. I'm not ok. I did not sleep a wink last night. Something was under my mattress."

The King gleefully got up and immediately proposed to this beautiful princess. So often in life we miss out on God's greatest blessings; on the things we pray for, because it's outwardly packaging doesn't match up to what our human like thinking conjures up. If that King would have never answered the door he would have lost his queen.

Photo Courtesy of Ruby Weddings

This story says so much to so many. If you are on the outside, that princess, who feels dirty and alone. You aren't. Jesus will always open the door. He hears your knock. He is "El Roi" the God who sees you. He hears you.

If you are that King, open.the.door. Stop listening to the voices of the enemy. Stop listening to outside influences. You know what you've prayed. It's time to claim it.

I'm thankful for this lesson; this story that replays in my heart. I love Him. Jesus, my King. He opened that door for me when He should have left me outside in the rain.

Day of Giving

The day of giving has come and gone. My 27th was by far one of the greatest birthdays I've ever had. You see every year I set myself up for failure and disappointment when it came time for my birthday. I had these expectations (mainly from my close friends and family) that they would shower me with love and time and that the day would be about me.

I wanted breakfast in bed. 

          I wanted coffee brought to me while I was working. 

I didn't want to have to cook and I wanted the day off. 

Every year the day turned into a lonely time. No one came and brought me breakfast. No one brought coffee. I got depressed.

Photo Courtesy of Matt Vivanco Photography

Then one day early in 2013 I realized just how selfish I was. Yes, it's great to have a day to ourselves. To get pampered and loved on. But if you didn't, would you still be filled and satisfied? So, starting with my 26th birthday I decided that no longer would I make the day about me. But that the most satisfying and fulfilling thing would be to make it about Him and to honor those around me and give back life. He gave me life, why shouldn't I share that with others?

This year I really felt inclined to work with a woman's home/kids home of some sort. When I found the Florence Crittenton Services Center online I knew instantly it would be the perfect fit. I connected immediately with the coordinator Narria and even volunteered weeks in advance before our big day.

Photo Courtesy of Matt Vivanco Photography

I knew I wanted to throw them a big party. I wanted these girls to know that they are not damaged goods. That even though they are at a different season in their life then say I was, that didn't make them any less than I. We are all sinners. We all need Him.

Weeks leading up to the event were stressful and in all honesty the night before I was a bit panicked on how this would all turn out.

Would my volunteers show up on time? Would the show up at all? Would we have enough time to do all that we want to do and will the flow be good?

Photo Courtesy of Matt Vivanco Photography

I knew that because I wanted to actively serve { and serve every where } that I needed to delegate tasks. So that is what I did. I had Christin { good 'ole bestie! } act as our event coordinator. Any issue, problem, or change went directly to her. I wanted the freedom to minister freely, to connect openly, and to serve wherever they needed me too.

I wanted these girls to feel normal for one day. Yes, they stay in a home, but you know what? They still deserve all that we deserve.

The day came. I was running off of 2 hours of sleep. I wanted my volunteers to know how much I loved and appreciated them so I purchased them breakfast and then eventually lunch. We got to the center bright and early at 7am. It was just me, Christin and my friend Cody to start. I got with Narria, figured out everything they needed, and we immediately go to work.

Photo Courtesy of Matt Vivanco Photography

Two of our biggest projects was to clean the kitchen, reorganize all of the pantries and to also turn their cafeteria into a winter wonderland for an event coming up. Cody and I immediately got started on the kitchen. As our volunteers trailed in they started in on the other projects.

We had a lot to do. We were also styling all of the women; doing hair, makeup, nails, and helping them to pick out clothes. Matt Vivanco, of Matt Vivanco Photography graciously offered his services and took portraits of the women and children as they wanted. He also took photographs of the event itself as it was going on. I will forever cherish these photographs.

Photo Courtesy of Matt Vivanco Photography

To say the event went flawless is an understatement. It did go flawless. It far exceeded my expectations! There was a moment when a young lady stopped me and she said, "Can I ask you a question?" I responded, "Sure!" She went on to ask me if it was really my birthday. When I told her it was she responded with, "I don't understand why you are here on your birthday doing these things for us. I wouldn't be. I would be making the day all about me. But I'm really happy you are here and I'm really glad you came."

I almost lost it. It is for these moments that I live. It's those Christ like moments that really fulfill me. My birthday is truly not about me. 

We also had four woman share their stories. We had a woman talk about being more than just a single mom, not letting that just become your story. We had one share about anger and motherhood and dealing with difficult and strong willed children. We had another talk about caring for yourself and I shared the story of the princess and the pea { I will blog that later }. These woman were not only being pampered but they were being loved on. We prayed several times throughout the day both over them and in private and used our time with them to really try and leave a footprint on their hearts.

When the day finally wrapped up some of the girls hearts were being opened. Tears where shed and lives where changed. Most importantly everyone assumed my goal was for us to touch them; but in reality I knew if these people came and served their lives would be changed. My life has been a constant change over the last three years of service to God and my community. I wanted that same life changing experience for them.

So, from the bottom of my heart. From my soul; thank you. Thank you to every single person that came out, both men and women. You made the start of my 27th year the most incredible start I've ever had. God is gracious and good and kind; and He's got a plan for all of you. For me. Thank you.

Until next years event!

Photo Courtesy of Matt Vivanco Photography